I'll Take Potpourri for $500, Alex

I got a lot of stories but no common theme, so today's column is a potpourri o'fun. First I'll go back to weekday adventures. On Tuesday, Melanie and I had "New Places Night," enjoying the spots less travelled in fair Plainfield. We started with a meal at Chompers on 30. I have to say that I liked this place; my adult grilled cheese (sounds like something from Skinemax, but it just had two kinds of cheese, tomato, and Dijon mustard) was quite tasty and Melanie enjoyed her margarita. There weren't many people there and I can't tell if this place is ever hopping, but the menu had a lot of tempting options. However, I will not be trying the chicken taco; Shannon informed me that it has corn in it, and if there was a first runnerup to peas on my "Most Unwanted Food" list, it's corn when it's unexpected. On the cob, yes! In a taco, aw naw. The other notable item from Chompers was the bumper sticker we saw in the parking lot, which read "Fat People Are Hard to Kidnap." Whether or not this theory came from experience, one does not know. Having a taste for ice cream, we decided to head to the long noticed, never entered "Dancing Tomatoes Pizza & Creamery," only to find out that with new owners came a loss of creamery. Some other day we'll check out the pizza and let you know the details. We then headed to downtown P-field to go to the Irish pub. It's a very cute place and the Irish coffee was the best I'd had besides in Ireland, but we were treated to an unexpected scene that made us decide to get out of there but quick: a menage a trois featuring two men in white tank tops, jeans, and tennis shoes and a blonde. The men were kissing the woman simultaneously, and at one point one of the men straddled the woman and spanked her. No, not quite what we were expecting from the Irish pub, so we met Angie at Alfa's for a fairly uneventful evening. Oh, in case you all were curious, the VIP chairs at Alfa's include ones belonging to "F'N Bill" and "F'N Wally." No, I haven't met them. . .yet.
Thursday's fun at Heroes and Legends including visits from Legends of the Past, including my pal Hillary from high school, her sister (and my JCA "l'il sis") Gigi, and our good buddy OJ. Adventures included seeing Whiskey Tango fans "J-Law," Tim, "Guy Whose Name I Can't Remember," "Plaid Man," and the random guy who yelled, "Whiskey Tango!" and high-fiving me near the dance floor, having another random man yelling "Miniskirt! Miniskirt!" and "Looky looky here!" at me while we were dancing, doing Jagerbombs (how anyone can do a shot in a wide mouth glass in one fell swoop is beyond me), and dancing (and eventually singing along, it was catchy) to some new rap song that includes the memorable lyrics, "To the window, to the wall, to the sweat drip down my balls." After Heroes, Gigi, Wens, and I headed over to Sam-why's for a brief stop before it closed. Judging from the lack of patrons, Samy's former status as the "hot spot" for Thursdays has come to a close. However, we did run into our old friend Adam and learn some lessons in martial arts outside, so all was not lost.
Wisconsin has been interesting so far. We were off to a good start when I heard two power ballads ("More Than Words" and "Heaven") on the way up. Last night's dinner at a local seafood restaurant was made entertaining by the oddly dressed waitress who wore the unlikely combo of a white sequined shirt with a big slash cut out of it, a long khaki "utility" skirt, and shoes with the toes curled like the Wicked Witch of the East. Today we did some shopping, and I saw not only a pillow that said, "God made us sisters, prozac made us friends," but also a picture that showed two clowns in a passionate embrace. Like two clowns in the jungle, makin' love. . . No mullets quite yet but I'm sure to be seeing some soon. We walked by a bar tonight that looked straight out of "The Accused," and I'm begging my dad to accompany me on a "fact-finding mission" at one of the local taverns, so we'll see how that goes. Time to hit the hay, mo' stories later!