She's Alive!

I am so sorry it's taken so long for me to write, I've been quite the busy bee as of lately. I don't know how far back in time I want to go to tell stories, but I'll tell you about what I remember. I also wanted to add a "shout out" to my cousin Jamie and his co-workers, who I hear are fans of Whiskey Tango.

My first exciting story comes from today's Herald News. There was an article about favorite employees of Troy Craughwell, where I went to school K-3. Not only was the school referred to in one segment as "Troy Cartwheel," but there was also a feature on my least favorite teacher of all time, Mrs. Malloy. When I was in kindergarten I had a lazy eye and thus had problems with depth perception, so I was not skilled at cutting and pasting. One day we had this project where we had to make a penguin (don't ask me why, it was spring!) out of construction paper. After many attempts, I gave up and started crying, eventually throwing my project in the garbage, which apparently offended Mrs. M. She asked me if I wanted her to call my mom. Apparently this was a threat, but I took it as a chance to go home and said yes. I passed kindergarten, of course, and all is well now, but I was extremely amused when I read this article, because it mentioned that Mrs. Malloy's two favorite things are St. Patrick's Day and, you guessed it, penguins. I'm even more proud of what I did now that I learned about this.

Last Wednesday I went to Great America, where, surprisingly, I didn't see as much trash as usual. I think it's because I wasn't around the water rides as much, which tend to attract the Whiskey Tangoers. Whiskey Tango:Skankier When Wet. However a man (I hope) in a Shaggy costume hit on me, which was disturbing, and I did see a man in a tee shirt reading "illanoizzzze" or something like that. I have to go now, but I promise I will add more later. For now, a question: Do you smell what the Rock is cookin'?