Thursday, August 05, 2004


The ghetto "Raiders" ride, complete with "lifelike" painting of Harrison Ford, that's been present at every carnival since I was a wee one. You'd think they'd try to change the name and update it for the new millenium, but nooo. Basically it's a lot of climbing and slides, but no snakes. Posted by Hello


"Hilbilly Village" (the typo is intentional) at Romeo Fest. I knew better than to enter. Posted by Hello


The "Carnyville," as I like to call it, at Romeo Fest. Posted by Hello


A lovely image of J-town. I feel like I should Photoshop in some graffiti. Posted by Hello


A sign outside Louis Joliet Mall, laced with a splash of innuendo. Are the "packages" complimentary, or the carry-out? The location: near the fugly flower display. Posted by Hello

Tuesday, August 03, 2004


My new favorite band name. Is that supposed to be a squirrel? Posted by Hello

Is She Really Going Out With Him?


I often have trouble coming up with titles here at Whiskey Tango, so on a trial basis I'm trying something new and quoting whatever song is currently on the radio as I'm typing. Currently on 99.9 is Joe Jackson's "Is She Really Going Out With Him," which is featured on the soundtrack to "There's Something About Mary."

In dance off news, they seem to be quite a trend these days. On my current favorite fake reality show, Joe Schmo 2, they had one last night, in which one of the participants claimed to have learned all his moves from "PS," aka Patrick Swayze. He didn't put baby in a corner.

It was a pretty busy weekend. Friday night, after eating some Dragon Light and having the pleasure of driving by some kind of circus in the F.I.M. (the Christmas Giant) parking lot, I went to see "The Village" at the Loews in Woodridge. I know, you're probably shocked it wasn't Ghetto 8 or Movies 10, but they don't have midnight showings in Joliet, alas. The theater was very nice, and they even had quesadillas. I did not partake, but Nancy seemed to enjoy them. As for the movie, I really don't know what to make of it. It was definitely interesting, and the twists were surprising, but I didn't like it as much as "The Sixth Sense" or "Signs," and it was more unintentionally funny than scary. I don't know if I liked it or not, but I want more people to see it so I can talk about it with them. It's hard to describe the movie without giving anything away, so I have to be pretty vague. I think I'd give it 2 or 2 1/2 stars.

Saturday evening was the first "Naperville Night" in quite a while. Melanie had informed me that the remodeled Features had finally opened, so a bunch of us headed up there. The new Features is really nice and pretty huge, they have a dance floor that lights up (though it's oddly positioned in the middle of the room so you have to walk through it to get to the back bar), and it's a lot sleeker than the old place. The music was great, and it was really crowded and quite a good time. Important note: they still have the nachos!!!! Not too many odd encounters with bar patrons except for a group of annoying guys, led by a more attractive version of Dustin "Samuel Screech Powers" Diamond as their spokesperson, who approached Kelly and I, including one gentleman that asked Kelly to stand up on a bar stool with him. He was somewhat large so I hope he wasn't suggesting the same stool, but Kelly declined nonetheless.

Sunday evening I headed to Chicago with Shannon and Joe to see our favorite Irish band,
Gaelic Storm, play at the Abbey Pub. If you've never heard of them, they're the band that plays in steerage in "Titanic," and they're really great. Props to my cousin Dave for getting me the new CD today! I'd never been to the Abbey before, and it's a really nice venue. The times I'd seen this band before were at one of the ballrooms at Navy Pier and the House of Blues, and I liked seeing them somewhere smaller. The concert was great, we were highly amused by fellow concert goers, including a couple of groups of "Gaelic Storm groupies," including one pair of girls whose footwear style consisted of one shoe off, one shoe on (diddle diddle dumpling, my son John). Another interesting man stood in front of us at the show and rather than keeping his eyes to the front, felt the need to constantly turn around and peer at us. He quickly earned the nicknames of "Pivot Pete" and "Swivel McSketchy." (Shanny, was that what you called him?)

Yesterday evening I went out to dinner with my sister to the new Outback. I had never been to an Outback before, and it was AWESOME. Definitely my new favorite chain restaurant. Once you figure out the bass-ackward path it takes to get there, you're in for a good time. Also a good time was my trip later in the evening to see "The Chronicles of Riddick" at Super Saver Cinema ($2.25 now). I had not seen "Pitch Black," the movie that this film is a sequel to, but I didn't think it would prevent me from appreciating the muscled goodness that is Vin Diesel. My lack of knowledge of the prior film did not hinder me, but the fact that Vin started the movie with dreadlocks that made him look like a
Puli was quite a buzzkill. Eventually he got back to his hot bald self, but he had the cheesiest one-liners ever. My personal favorite occurs when Vin encounters Thandie Newton's character, who's supposed to be the "Lady MacBeth" of the movie, SNIFFS HER and says, "It's been a long time since I've smelled beautiful." I'm sure that line will be popular on the bar circuit.

In Herald News news, while looking through the "Open Line Extra" today, I noticed that the Open Line comment about my "Ladies' Night" column was printed again. Though I was hoping that my last column might have stirred up some Open Line comments, I was more than happy to see that comment printed again. Now let's see what happens after my next column. . .That's all for now, check out the photo above this post for my new favorite band name, as seen on a poster at the Abbey Pub.

You Can't Say Nuclear, That Really Scares Me


Few things make me happier than this website. Now to decide what t-shirt to buy. Thanks for telling me about this, Shanny!

Subscribe to
Whiskey Tango: Tales From J-Town!